I only know popular science / scifi, but I like the tube idea. If you throw away one end of the tube really fast, like the speed of light, the tube will automatically get longer, probably allowing you to hold on to the other end comfortably. The examples in popular science usually involve ladders instead of tubes, but it may be transferable. Then, if you throw it even faster like over the speed of light (there are some people that say this is impossible, the trick is to ignore them), it will break the limit of causality and any messages you shout into one end should be encountered by you before you shouted them. Maybe with some weird Dopler effect. And maybe I'm wrong...
